Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
