He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
