It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
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