this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
