worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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