TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
