I wanna passion pit in your ass
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize