remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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