umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
