there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Randomize
