i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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