What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
