I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
