Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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