I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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