Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
