just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Randomize