I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
