Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
