Having a random hookup so left but love u
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
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