I hope mine doesn't look like that
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
