i barfeds in our rink
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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