Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
