Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
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