you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
