He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
We left the knife in your bed.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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