I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
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