CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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