I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize