apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
