ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
