my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
