Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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