her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
