I puked a lego.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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