I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
