Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I want her autograph on my taint
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
its liver damage thursday
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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