Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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