She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
A bitchslap is in order.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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