My nipple is on Facebook.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You are the jesus of drinking
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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