I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize