Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
