that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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