I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize
