I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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