yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Randomize
