She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
