It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Randomize
