Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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