Grow some girl-balls and come out already
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
