Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
